Lately, I’ve been reticent to describe myself as a “nerd” or “geek.” No, it’s not because of my disbelief in the concept of geek chic, or any other kind of anti-establishment nonsense. It’s because I’ve realized that a growing number of self-proclaimed geeks have gone wayyy off the deep end with their nerdity. Some of the arguments I’ve seen, heard, or read about have been nothing short of appalling. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: William Shatner said it best in that classic Saturday Night Live skit. “Get a life.”

Before I go on, let me make one thing very clear. This is not meant as a generalized “fuck you” to all people who describe themselves as geeks or nerds. A majority of my friends fall into this category, so it’s not like I’m flipping them the bird. I’m not trying to put myself on some lofty pedestal above the nerdy peasants, either. The targets of my wrath are the stereotypical geeks and nerds, simply because the stereotype is rapidly becoming the norm!

I blame much of this aberrant behavior on the Internet. Like with many other forms of fanboyism, the Internet has both brought people together and thrown a tanker truck filled with gasoline onto the fire. Visit any nerd-themed online community, like a video game site, anime forum, or science fiction network, and you’ll know exactly what I’m talking about. The emotional ranting and raving that goes on there over the dumbest subjects on the planet is just plain sad. It’s not the discussions themselves that are the problem; it’s that those discussing them feel that they’re the most important topics in the universe, when in reality, anyone with a brain knows that have no relevance to modern society. It’s fiction, people.

The worst is that when people have backed away from nerdy pursuits in order to spend more time in the real world (e.g., with family, dealing with financial issues, having fun outside, et cetera)…they’re flamed for it! It’s the kind of behavior that makes you feel ashamed, even if you weren’t involved.

The geeky extremism naturally extends to the most celebrated of nerd gatherings, the convention. While some conventions are certainly nerdier than others (like Star Trek and anime festivals), all of them are a veritable cornucopia of the geek stereotype. I’ve been to many a comic book convention in my travels, including the massive Wizard World Chicago shows, and like Winston Zeddemore, I have seen shit that’ll turn you white. I’ve literally seen shouting matches over topics that don’t mean jack shit in the real world, yet these nerds consider them to be of paramount importance. The overwhelming nerd factor is the main reason I’m reluctant to attend conventions anymore, aside from the fact that I no longer collect comic books.

I’ve gotten into lengthy discussions concerning the political climate of the United Federation of Planets, talked about the significance of the blinking lights on Darth Vader’s armor, and considered who would win a fight between Unicron and Galactus. So, I’d think that my nerd credentials are in order, and I know I’ll never escape the label, as it were; cripes, I work in IT and I like Star Trek, so my fate is sealed. However, I also know when to “shut it off,” because I know this stuff’s just for fun, nor is it everyone’s cup of tea. It seems that a majority of nerds and geeks these days do not understand this simple concept. They’re no longer a social group I feel all that comfortable identifying with; there’s much more to life than nerdy pursuits. If you’re spending a majority of the day playing World of Warcraft, seriously, go the fuck outside.

The mess in Iran has let loose of flood of support for the protesters over there. While I certainly agree with them, as I’m no fan of religious dictatorships, I do disagree with many Americans’ hardline views on the matter. Plenty of pundits, politicians, and even my peers think we need to do more to support the fledgling democracy in Iran.

I think we need to do less.

Before you start shouting, hear me out. This isn’t some big middle finger to the rest of the world; far from it. My belief is this: who are we to decide what form of government is best for other countries? We’ve tried forcing our views on others countless times in the past, and it’s rarely worked out for the best. While the Iranian situation is deplorable, it’s their problem. The Iranian people need to work it out on their own, without our interference.

Furthermore, the United States has a boatload of internal problems right now. We need to fix our own country before we could even think of advising others on how to run theirs! Our economy’s in the shitter, our educational system is a joke, healthcare is a contradiction in terms, and billions of Americans are obscenely fat and appallingly stupid. (Don’t believe me on that latter point? Look at people’s obsession with celebrities and reality television.)

I’m all for other nations trying to better themselves through the will of the populace. We just need to back off and let them handle it.

As many of you may know, I’m a huge fan of heavy metal. I always have been, even since I saw cheesy hair bands on MTV in the 1980s, and moved on to much more talented and technical bands in the following years. While most of my peers moved on to the alternative trend, then the rap-rock trend, and who knows what else, I stayed true to my metal roots.

Over the past decade or so, I’ve become much more interested in progressive metal, as well as extreme metal (such as black metal, death metal, and grindcore). The latter has made things exceptionally difficult when it comes to discussing music with other people, simply because I don’t know anyone else who’s into it. There’s a few exceptions when it comes to specific bands (for example, my brother also likes Dimmu Borgir, and I got my girlfriend into some of Devin Townsend‘s music), but they’re few and far between. By and large, the extreme metal I enjoy is unknown to others at best, and despised by them at worst.

It makes me feel uncomfortable when people ask me about my music. I do love talking about it, but I see folks’ eyes glaze over very quickly once I mention my favorite genres or bands. So, it’s really not worth talking about, now is it? Lately, I’m trying really hard to catch myself before I babble too much. I also try to change the subject, or answer any questions as briefly as possible.

I realize that a possible solution to this problem is to join some online message boards and other communities dedicated to extreme metal. However, that idea gives me pause. The Internet has contributed much to human culture and communication, but when it comes to bringing large groups of rabid fans together, I think it does more harm than good. (Like with video games.) I’ve lurked on a few metal boards, and the griping and flaming that goes on there makes me roll my eyes in disgust. A lot of the members there are kids who listen to extreme music as a form of rebellion; we’ve all been there at one point or another, but we outgrow it. The discussions rapidly devolve into flame wars, complete with horrendously bad spelling and grammar, and you know that ticks me off. These communities don’t look like places I’d want to spend a lot of time; plus, if I want to talk about music, it’s vastly preferable to do so with people who are actually in the room listening to it with you! (Oh well. I’m a member of far too many message boards and such as it is.)

A majority of my music listening is done in the car and at my desk at work. Both of those situations are ones in which I’m alone 99% of the time, anyway, so the solitary factor is one I’ve been able to get used to. Still, it blows not being able to share my love of intense music.

The new buzzword in pop culture today is “reboot.” Ever since Ron Moore’s Battlestar Galactica soared to new heights of quality, just about every studio under the sun has wanted a piece of the pie. Not only that, a reboot provides a convenient way for series that have dropped in popularity or otherwise fallen by the wayside to make a strong comeback. In recent years, we’ve seen successful reboots of many franchises, including Transformers, James Bond, and the Batman films. But all is not sunny.

I should first point out that a reboot is not the same thing as a remake. Those we’ve seen for quite some time, and they’ve become ridiculously popular in the last decade or so. Just look at all of the crappy 1970s television that’s been turned into crappy movies!

The other term that’s bandied about sometimes, especially in reference to Battlestar Galactica, is “reimagining.” This is just a stupid alternative term created to avoid using the word “reboot.” Considering what the entire premise is designed for (resurrecting a franchise), they both mean the same damned thing! There’s nothing wrong with using the word “reboot” when applicable, so substituting a more pretentious term is just retarded. (Get it?)

But I digress. While I thoroughly enjoyed the Battlestar Galactica reboot, as well as the semi-reboot that was the new Star Trek film, I’m beginning to worry. We’re seeing reboots with increasing frequency now, and in some cases, they’re completely unnecessary. A recent example is the upcoming video game Castlevania: Lords of Shadow. This is a reboot of the entire Castlevania franchise…but why? Even though previous games in the series have all taken place in the same timeline, each Castlevania game is essentially a standalone title. You don’t need to play any of the other games in the series in order to understand what’s going on. Gamers were never confused by this, so rebooting the series makes no sense at all.

To come back to Battlestar Galactica for a moment, there’s been rumors swirling around for a while that Universal Pictures wants to make a Battlestar Galactica film for theatrical release. While this might sound good on paper, here’s the part that’ll make you bang your head on your desk: it’s not based on the original series, or the rebooted series. It’s going to be a standalone film…in other words, another reboot! Moore’s series just ended its run a few months ago; there’s an interquel telefilm (The Plan) on the way this fall, and a prequel series (Caprica) coming early next year. Those are very fresh in people’s minds, so why confuse them by throwing what’s tantamout to a third Battlestar Galactica universe into the mix? Most importantly, though, is that reboots are generally used to resuscitate flagging series; the Battlestar Galactica reboot was a monster success. Starting all over again is completely pointless!

To close out this post, I suppose I should mention the most negative of the re-words, and that’s “rehash.” A rehash is when someone flagrantly rips off an already existing property or properties and boldly call it their own (e.g., just about everything Joss Whedon has done post-Buffy). Rehashes are something else that’s been on the rise in recent years, and that’s far worse than a glut of unnecessary reboots.

My post about downscaling my gaming habit got me thinking about my other hobbies, some of the unfortunate side effects they cause, and what to do about them. (And holy shit, did I file this under enough categories, or what?)

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate any of my hobbies; I’m just not pleased that I have far too many of them. In my neverending quest to become a somewhat decent human being, I do understand that sometimes the most innocuous hobbies can cause problems with one’s life. The main issue is that a majority of my hobbies revolve around acquiring some kind of physical object, such as an action figure, building set, video game, book, et cetera. As such, this immediately creates two problems: price and space. You need money to buy said item, and a place in which to display or store it. Both of these are serious issues, and even worse, they sometimes compound one another! I’m not affluent (or even upper middle class) by any stretch of the imagination, so indulging in my hobbies tends to have financial ramifications down the line that I’m not always prepared for. So what’s a man to do?

Here’s a rundown of my various hobbies, and the problems I’m running into while keeping up with them. Aside from giving you an insight into my madness, it’ll help me keep track of this stuff later on. I should point out that this stuff was all acquired over the course of a decade or two; I certainly don’t have the cash to acquire massive quantities of stuff in a short period of time!

• LEGO®. This one gives no quarter; the entire premise of being a LEGO® fan is based on the building sets themselves. You need to own at least a few in order to get involved! The upshot is that once you’ve got a good amount of bricks, you can create just about anything you want. You can display an official model for a while, then if you get tired of it, rebuild it into something else. It’s not like a collectible game, where you’re absolutely required to spend money on a regular basis just to stay competitive! (That’s the exact reason why I gave up on playing Magic: The Gathering long ago, and Axis & Allies Miniatures more recently.) With my LEGO® addiction, space has become my biggest challenge. I’ve completely run out of room to display my sets (mainly Star Wars ships), so I’ve been forced to disassemble many of them.

• Star Trek. The beloved science fiction franchise spans over forty years of history, twenty-nine seasons of television, and eleven films, not to mention all of the countless merchandising and other goodies. The television shows and films are most important to me; I own all of the films (save the newest one, which isn’t available on disc yet, and Star Trek V, which is crap), but only five of the twenty-nine seasons. I’ve got a lot of catching up to do, and that’s not going to be cheap. Granted, Voyager and the first two seasons of Enterprise can wait until the very end, but I’ve still got a majority of the original series, The Next Generation, and Deep Space Nine to pick up.
• Star Wars. The core of this franchise is the films, and there’s not many of those; that made collecting them quite easy. I also enjoy reading some of the novels, and collecting the artbooks and other reference tomes. However, when it comes to Star Wars action figures…therein lies the rub. Even casual fans of the franchise know how addicting that can be, and I’m no different. I used to display them in my office at work (gotta be the stereotypical IT department, and all), but since we moved to a new location, I now have a cubicle rather than an office. Thus, I no longer have a door that I can lock. I don’t think anyone would pilfer or otherwise screw with my collection, but why not err on the side of caution? Since I’ve got nowhere else to put them, though, they now sit in a box in my apartment complex storage space.
• Model railroads. While this is one of my most enjoyed hobbies, it’s sadly one of the most neglected, simply to due to the high cost. I’m “over the hump,” as it were; the most expensive pieces of my layout were the tracks, locomotives, and control system. However, I’ve still got landscaping materials to buy, plus model cars and tiny little people. Those aren’t cheap! If I don’t finish my layout this summer, I’ve got a feeling it will be indefinitely shelved.
• Video games. Ouch. This one’s definitely the 800-pound gorilla in the room, since I play a lot of games. They’ve never been cheap, and with more and more titles coming out all the time, with more platforms competing for market share, costs can add up insanely fast. Part of this can be alleviated by renting games, but that creates two more problems. One, renting from chains like Blockbuster is a complete ripoff; the rental price is too high, and you’ve only got about five days to play! Two, even if you use a much better system like GameFly, now you run into the subscription problem. Here, you’re paying a flat fee per month to rent a certain number of titles (GameFly wisely offers a tiered system), but what if there’s a few months where nothing’s coming out, or there isn’t anything you’re interested in playing? Now you’re literally spending money on nothing. As far as older titles are concerned, emulation’s a quick solution, but legal issues aside, that doesn’t compare to playing original games on original hardware. It just doesn’t! (I keep a 13″ CRT TV in my room specifically for retrogaming, fer crissake.) I’ve focused much of my attention on my NES collection, but those still take up space. Right now, I’m using the ol’ cardboard-boxes-in-the-closet method, save for a small stack of cartridges I’m actively playing. Those get a place of honor on my desk. Classy.
• Heavy metal. You’d think that simply enjoying listening to music wouldn’t cost too much, since you don’t have to pay to use your ears. And as far as acquiring music goes, that’s inexpensive, too, especially in this day and age of iTunes. Too bad I’m one of those old-fashioned fuckers who enjoys owning actual physical copies of his media! The backlog of discs I still want to buy would probably equal the down payment on a small house. Eesh. My subscriptions to Decibel magazine and the Requiem Metal Podcast have exacerbated this addiction by getting me into many new bands.
• Books. Normally, this isn’t a problem, as we have libraries for all of our reading needs. However, some of the licensed series I enjoy (particularly Star Trek novels) have little to no library presence. Translation: if you want to read it, you’d better buy it, and I’ve bitched about the ridiculous cost of paperbacks before. Even though the recent Star Trek film has breathed new life into the franchise, the books are still a relatively niche commodity. The Star Trek section at my local bookstores just keeps shrinking over time, and when new novels come out, you really need to nab them within a week or so of release, else you run the risk of missing them. Then, of course, there’s the fact that eventually, my bookshelves at home start to get very crowded.
• Manga. Since the stories I enjoy only come out every few months, this one’s at the bottom of the problem pile. Prices are on the rise, though, and I read much of my manga well in advance via scanlations. I buy the official collected English editions later on. If the prices get more annoying, I may dump the printed versions, and just stick to reading them online. And before you bitch at me about the “illegality” of scanlations, they’re not technically illegal, and publishers often use them as a way to gauge interest in localizing new series! Eat me.

As you can see, the solution to many of these issues falls under the usual purview of “stop buying shit.” Which, as it turns out, is something I’m actively working on, especially in the video game realm. I know that sooner or later I’m going to have to no choice but to severely scale back or ditch a few hobbies, but them’s the breaks. It’s happened before (like when I ditched that filthy comic book collectin’ habit), and I’d like to think I’m a better person for it. Life is more than just random collections.