Lately, I’ve been reticent to describe myself as a “nerd” or “geek.” No, it’s not because of my disbelief in the concept of geek chic, or any other kind of anti-establishment nonsense. It’s because I’ve realized that a growing number of self-proclaimed geeks have gone wayyy off the deep end with their nerdity. Some of the arguments I’ve seen, heard, or read about have been nothing short of appalling. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: William Shatner said it best in that classic Saturday Night Live skit. “Get a life.”

Before I go on, let me make one thing very clear. This is not meant as a generalized “fuck you” to all people who describe themselves as geeks or nerds. A majority of my friends fall into this category, so it’s not like I’m flipping them the bird. I’m not trying to put myself on some lofty pedestal above the nerdy peasants, either. The targets of my wrath are the stereotypical geeks and nerds, simply because the stereotype is rapidly becoming the norm!

I blame much of this aberrant behavior on the Internet. Like with many other forms of fanboyism, the Internet has both brought people together and thrown a tanker truck filled with gasoline onto the fire. Visit any nerd-themed online community, like a video game site, anime forum, or science fiction network, and you’ll know exactly what I’m talking about. The emotional ranting and raving that goes on there over the dumbest subjects on the planet is just plain sad. It’s not the discussions themselves that are the problem; it’s that those discussing them feel that they’re the most important topics in the universe, when in reality, anyone with a brain knows that have no relevance to modern society. It’s fiction, people.

The worst is that when people have backed away from nerdy pursuits in order to spend more time in the real world (e.g., with family, dealing with financial issues, having fun outside, et cetera)…they’re flamed for it! It’s the kind of behavior that makes you feel ashamed, even if you weren’t involved.

The geeky extremism naturally extends to the most celebrated of nerd gatherings, the convention. While some conventions are certainly nerdier than others (like Star Trek and anime festivals), all of them are a veritable cornucopia of the geek stereotype. I’ve been to many a comic book convention in my travels, including the massive Wizard World Chicago shows, and like Winston Zeddemore, I have seen shit that’ll turn you white. I’ve literally seen shouting matches over topics that don’t mean jack shit in the real world, yet these nerds consider them to be of paramount importance. The overwhelming nerd factor is the main reason I’m reluctant to attend conventions anymore, aside from the fact that I no longer collect comic books.

I’ve gotten into lengthy discussions concerning the political climate of the United Federation of Planets, talked about the significance of the blinking lights on Darth Vader’s armor, and considered who would win a fight between Unicron and Galactus. So, I’d think that my nerd credentials are in order, and I know I’ll never escape the label, as it were; cripes, I work in IT and I like Star Trek, so my fate is sealed. However, I also know when to “shut it off,” because I know this stuff’s just for fun, nor is it everyone’s cup of tea. It seems that a majority of nerds and geeks these days do not understand this simple concept. They’re no longer a social group I feel all that comfortable identifying with; there’s much more to life than nerdy pursuits. If you’re spending a majority of the day playing World of Warcraft, seriously, go the fuck outside.